Tips for a Long Distance Relationship (Part 2)

For the first part of this two-part series, I had H (the boyfriend) come over and help me out and give you some tips on surviving a long distance relationship. H and I spend every summer (~2 months) about 800 miles apart. You can read part one here. How do I live without this stellar human being? Read on.

Be intentional about communicating. I work a lot during the summer and because of that, H and I don't find a lot of time to talk. But you've got to show your boyfriend that they still deserve your time. I'll call H whenever I can--on the walk home from work, or sometimes when I get off my shift at midnight. Yes, I'm exhausted at that point, but it's worth it to be the time into our relationship.

Send letters and care packages. It's really special to have something tangible with you that you know your boyfriend or girlfriend has touched and put together. Letters are cheap and always fun to get. Care packages can be cheap too--fill it up with little things that remind you of them wherever you are. Encourage them to send you one too!

Be really honest. Really really really honest. When you're not face to face, it's really easy to misunderstand things or not notice how the other person is feeling. It may feel tough, but it's best to be honest about how you're feeling about things. If you're angry, don't push it down and let it boil up--deal with it. If you're in a bad mood, don't just be grumpy--admit you're in a bad mood. When I'm in a funk, I always tell H and he'll send me pictures of cute animals or bad jokes or funny internet articles until I can cheer up a little.

Trust each other. This one sometimes seems really tough to do, but it will make both of you infinitely more happy with the relationship. I try to let H do pretty much whatever he wants as long as it doesn't hurt him or us. Hopefully, you're with someone who makes trusting easy but sometimes you might not be. Don't be controlling and set rules for each other--you need to trust your boyfriend that he'll be honorable.

Are you in a long distance relationship? How did you make it work?

P.S. Don't forget about the Adventure Lovin' Giveaway going on right now. And ad spaces are also on SALE!

Tips for a Long Distance Relationship (Part 1)

For this two-part series, I'm having H (the boyfriend) come over and help me out and give you some tips on surviving a long distance relationship. H and I spend every summer (~2 months) about 800 miles apart. Here's how we do it:



Greetings fellow members of the interwebs, you can call me H. Not because I have anything to hide, I just like feeling mysterious. I like hunting, fishing, offroading, blowing things up/lighting things on fire, NASCAR, football, baseball, golf, the south, and my bitchin 95 ford bronco. That's not everything but it should give you a rough idea of who I am.

I've been dating Allie for a while now, and I think she's pretty cool. You should definitely follow her blog. If Bob Saget wasn't so tweaked out on coke all the time he would give it two thumbs up, so that just goes to show how awesome her blog is. Anyways, this is our second summer together. During the summer, I stay here in Dixie and hold down the fort while Allie goes up North. Long distance relationships are far from easy but they are possible. Here are some tips that help us get through the summer:

Look at the small picture. When I go on runs, I focus on a crack in the sidewalk about 20-30 feet away, run to it, pick another crack, run to it, etc.... If I look way ahead, I get discouraged and I get worn out faster. When I focus on something close to me and run to it, I find that I can run much farther and the run is much less miserable. This same idea can be applied to long distance relationships. Instead of getting overwhelmed by the idea of being away from your loved one for (enter time apart here), take things day by day. When you wake up in the morning, focus your mind on getting through that day. Don't look at the big picture, look at the small one.

 

Go out of your way to make your time apart as easy as possible on the other person. Make time for phone calls and skype dates. You don't have to set aside a whole hour for a phone call, even 15 minute phone calls are nice. When you can't talk on the phone or skype, text them. When you can't text, just send a little text saying something nice and letting them know what you're up to. One of me and Allies favorite methods of communication is letter writing! It may not be as popular as it once was but I love it. You can write about future date ideas, tell them stories that they haven't heard, tell them things you like about them, or write really anything that comes to mind. You can draw pictures too! I'm no artist but it adds a little personal touch.

 

Keep yourself busy. If you're broke like me, you may think that it's hard to keep busy when your wallet is as empty as a doughnut box in a police station. However, there are many things you can do to keep busy without having to spend much or anything. Things to do with a little money: Go see a band you've never heard of (cover charges at music venue near me are usually $7 for minors, $5 for adults). Go to a discount movie theater or get a redbox movie (there's a $2 movie theater near me, and redbox is only $1.20). Go to a minor league sporting event (the tickets for the minor league baseball team here are $14), There are many more things you can do on a budget, those are just the first three I could think of. Things to do for free: Go to a park, read, window shop, clean/organize (I know, not very fun but it still keeps you busy), run/walk/exercise, cook (Not free for everyone, but I still live at home so I don't buy groceries. If you have to buy your own groceries, you can still cook on a budget. And no, I don't mean ramen noodles). There's plenty of things to do for free. Just google free things to do in (enter city here), and I'm sure you'll find something. The less time you spend alone doing nothing the better.

 

Give your significant things for them to remember you by. Allie has some of my t-shirts, a sweatshirt, a bottle of my cologne, a bear I gave her for valentines day, and a photo album full of pictures of us. I have one of her t-shirts, some sweatshirts, one of her stuffed animals, and a bottle of her perfume. Sure it's not the most manly thing to sleep with a stuffed sheep covered in perfume, but it helps. Having some of hers stuff makes me feel closer to her, especially her perfume. Every little bit helps in a long distance relationship.

I hope these tips help!

Thanks for reading,

H

P.S. Tune back in next week to hear my tips on how I survive living without this stellar human being. --Allie